"Give me the power, when the very joy that was set before me is gone, to stand unconquered amid the night, and say, “To the eye of my Father it is perhaps shining still.” I shall reach the climax of strength when I have learned to wait for hope."
-George Matheson
Just when I thought He didn’t care..
Tonight, I felt a little yucky. down, sad, just.. blah. Sat on my bed, opened my journal, spilled my heart out & just had some time of speaking to God about what was going on in my head, and in my heart. Opened my Bible and read:
“Answer my prayers, Lord
For your UNFAILING LOVE is WONDERFUL.
Take care of me,
For your MERCY IS SO PLENTIFUL.”
Just when I felt like He didn’t know what I was going through… He answered me. I don’t know where you’re at in your life… if you know God, if you don’t; if you knew Him at one point and aren’t quite sure about this Jesus that you hear about… or if you have no clue who He is…. but please take note: HE CARES about your life. About every detail. He cares about your heart. Those deep things that no one knows about.. those thoughts that you think no one would understand… He knows, cares, wants to take care of you…
this song speaks to my heart in volumes i couldn’t even express…
Jaye Thomas - Song of Love
50 plays
There is ALWAYS beauty.
Regarding my last post…
Regardless of your beliefs, religion, if you have no religion, take on life, perception of who you are, etc. - I think we all need to know that in EVERY single situation, there is beauty in it all. Yes, even when it’s ugly, dark, crappy, hopeless at the moment, etc. .. there is beauty in it, if you’re willing to look for it.
I personally believe God made me. Formed me from this ground. From the dust. And He’s made every single one of us beautifully. If He can make beauty from the dust… I certainly believe He’s out to make something beautiful out of us - and that means everything that concerns us.
God’s been showing me that He is SO good. I can’t explain why life gets crappy sometime… but I can explain the beauty that comes out of those times. Thank you Lord!
Bliss
This movie has made it onto my favorite movie list. Amazing, amazing, amazing. Follows the journey of a girl trying to find her way after being raped in her small, Turkish village. Story of hope and redemption - ah! If you like foreign films, you definitely need to watch this!
Never-ending Spiral of Destruction.
I often laugh at myself, or get mad..one of the two, when I find myself in situations that look identical to previous situations…. that were no good. You know that saying - “history repeats itself.” Well, I believe that history (in my own life) will surely repeat itself if I don’t wake up, remember the path that I was once on before (bad, bad & bad) & do something to change it. That’s daily for me. It’s daily for anyone really. Whenever I breathe, I have the opportunity to change the path of my life for the better - or continue down the same pretty path of destruction that I once was on.
Note the word “pretty” … yeeeauh, a lot of stupid things I did looked REAL pretty to me. And that’s the problem with a lot people my age - destructive things start off appealing, pretty, friendly… & the next thing you know, we’re back in the same hell hole we just got out of.
Random thoughts - I know. But I guess its my bit of encouragement for you today. Leave the never-ending spiral of destruction alone. Remember the regretted-history of your life… and realize that there is enough of hope and grace for you NOT to repeat it.
“The people we don’t like to talk with..
…are the very people that could set you free.”
Meet Kevin. He’s “homeless” (he has a home… a tent, right by the train tracks in Downtown Victorville). His family lives in Marin County (San Fran area). And the only people he really has are his other “homeless” friends and his two pups - Roxy (on the left) and Bonnie (right). Just sitting and talking with Kevin was amazing. I didn’t want to go.. he shared his life with us. People he didn’t even know, but it was as if we knew each other for years. As I talked with him, I saw some hint of hope in his eyes. This man’s eye were bright blue. The prettiest eyes that I’ve ever seen… and it shocked me. Even with very little… his eyes still sparkled. I’ve come across people with much, and they remain dull. Kevin may not have the best living conditions.. but there is a drive, and a hope that not a lot of people have. That was inspiring.
I got to hang out with numerous homeless people today. It was SUCH a blessing. I’m starting to realize, all that I have isn’t all that its cracked up to be. It may sound corny or whatever, but I’m learning without love… I really have nothing. Oh God, help me!
life is rough sometimes.
I like to be in reality. So here we go…. Life sucks, excuse my choice of words, some of the time. And right about now, there are a few `sucky` things that are taking place in my life. But for some reason - I’m not moved by these things. Moved to pray… moved to cry because my heart breaks. But not moved to disbelieve in my Jesus.
God, help me to stay focused on your light….
The Irresistible Revolution.
Food. Clothes. Shoes. A bed. A shower. A toothbrush. A roof over our heads. A car. Comfort.
If not all of these, we have most of them. I’ve been reading a book called The Irresistible Revolution by Shane Claiborne. Talk about shaking up perspective! I’m only halfway through it and I’m inspired and challenged to change. Reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan last week, and following it with this book has been a double whammy! It’s been convicting me to love beyond measure. You know, to love the unloveable.. to love the outcasts of society, and to dislove my own comfortability. Don’t get me wrong - I think its fine to have nice things - but I think lines start to get crossed when my comfort blocks my view of the fact that there are others around me. And that’s exactly what this book is opening my eyes to see… there are other people around me. In my own home, in the coffee shop I go in all the time, in the car right next to me at the red light, in the grocery aisle, etc. And my pray has become, “Lord - never let me miss an opportunity to give your love to anyone and everyone.”
I read about people like St. Francis of Assisi, Mother Teresa, Heidi Baker, Jesus… etc. and for some reason, I used to immedietely disqualify myself from doing anything like they did/do. But the funny thing is - is that I’m called to “do greater things than these” (John 14:12). I’ve been called to love the widow & the orphan… For pete’s sake - I’m called to love God & love people. So if you were anything like me and just liked to read the stories of people who have gone before us in this life of radical love - join me in the adventure of a lifetime … to actually live a life of radical love, compassion & hope. Join me in taking the time to look people in the eyes, show them their valuable, encourage them with a smile, a kind word.. a hug even. Get out of yourself, as I get out of myself.
Let’s start a revolution that lasts forever.
